My Downfall
by HybridKiller
Summary: [JC] Fate, unable to change, unable to prevent. From the depths of pain, my heart had found the one thing my genius couldn't prevent... mortality, depression and pain. [Oneshot]


**A/N**: Hey... yeah, just a warning. This story has a couple swear words here and there. If you shouldn't be reading that type of language, or you don't like it, then please don't read my story. Thanks! 

Disclaimer: In no way, do Iown Jimmy Neutron or any related themes... As though you didn't already know that...

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**My Downfall**

---

"…_But this time, my reasons for protection faded. Everything I had once known disappeared before me, crumbling and growing raw with revenge. When I looked into her emerald green eyes, I no longer saw anything worth saving. _

_Just minutes after the action of death, I had spun myself to her that fateful night. Spilling my heart with everything I wished her to hear. Though when my words spoke what my heart had concealed, she blankly stared back. Then her features turned to a raw smile and mocked everything I had ever believed. She looked me straight in the eyes and laughed. Laughed at what I said; then ridiculed me for it. _

_My life held but one meaning, to hold love for a blond haired girl. But when she had betrayed me, when she had destroyed everything I had ever lived for. It was clear to me—there is no point to my life at all…"_

---

"Nerdtron! Get out here right now! This is the last damn straw! I can't believe you'd do that!" I hollered at the top of my voice. How could he? How the hell could he leave me like this?

It was nearing four in the morning, much too early to awaken him. But he left me no choice! On my doorstep was a note. A note written in a rushed hand.

We had been assigned partners for a project. He had sworn he'd do the finishing touches tonight. But guess what? He couldn't finish!

That's right. I spent three fucking days on my part; I gave him a whole week to do his. And how does he respond? He writes me a note saying he can't—the night before it's due! And what time did this note 'appear' on my doorstep? TEN MINUTES AGO!

"NERDTRON, GET OUT HERE," I screamed once more. I threw a small pebble at his window, he didn't answer. It occurred to me then that he'd probably be in his lab.

I pulled from my pocket a hair of his and entered his sacred utopia.

Upon my entrance fell before me a sullen boy. A boy looking blankly at his computer screen, crystal tears subtly and silently sliding down his cheek. All I could do was stare at his bloodshot eyes; confused to why he looked so sad. But I was more alert to the sense of panic surrounding him—something was up.

I looked at him and held up the note. "What the hell?"

"W-wha? CINDY? What are you doing in my lab?" His hands quickly ran up to his face, wiping away any tears and hiding them from my gaze. "Get out!"

"No! What the hell is this?" I flashed the note once more, "Why can't you finish?"

"Why? Because I have more important things to do!"

"Like what? Invent some crappy thing that won't work? Or is crying in front a computer screen more important then my future?"

"That's it. Get out of my lab!"

"Make me." I crossed my arms. "I'm not leaving until you DO OUR PROJECT."

"I told you, I don't have time to do such insignificant things!"

My eyebrow rose, "And why not?"

"I ca—it doesn't matter! Just get out of my lab, NOW."

"I'm not leaving."

"Fine…" He roughly walked passed me. "If it will get you out of my lab, follow me." He bitterly walked out of his sanctuary and into the murky night.

The night sky was dark. Dark enough to reflect a million stars down past our gaze. Had I not been fuming with rage, I would have probably commented on how beautiful the stars looked. But that meant nothing to me now. Nerdtron would die, DIE, before the night is out. I swear to you now. I would murder him for the hell he's putting me through. I will make sure his blood sheds this sour night… my grades were too important to fuck up. And I'll murder him, if he destroys my perfect record.

The boy, infinitely shorter then I am, turned his swirly shaped hair and faced me. His eyes burned with fire. "Now that you're OUT of my lab… What the hell's your problem?"

"What's MY problem? I just got a notice in the middle of the fucking morning saying you can't finish our assignment! Do you know how many hours I've spent on this thing!"

"Calm down, it's not that big of a deal! Sheesh, you'd think the world ended or something!"

"Calm down? You're fucking kidding me! There is no damn way I'm working on this thing anymore… and I'm NOT failing this project!"

He turned his head and looked into my eyes. Then he smiled at me.

I glared in return. "What are you smiling at? This isn't funny!"

"You should hear yourself… you really can be hilarious."

"HILARIOUS?" I screamed, "What's that suppose to mean? This isn't a joke!" He looked at me again. Though this time, he chucked to himself. "What are you laughing at? It's four in the morning and we will be graded tomorrow!"

"Seriously, Cindy. Calm down—it's not that bad. Could you honestly imagine me, Jimmy Neutron, not finishing a project? Relax, none of that matters… nothing matters anymore."

"What! If this is a joke… I'll smack you so hard…"

"Smack me? Heh… You know… You are a little cute when you're mad."

My heart stopped. What the hell did he just say? And why did he say that so abruptly? Random… What the fuck? None-the-less, I could feel my cheeks grow warm as my blush reflected against the stars. "What did you just say?"

"I'm serious. You do. Though you look even better when your face is the color of a turnip." A goofy smile fell on his face.

Against my better judgment, my tone of voice dropped a notch, "R-really…?"

His smile, enchanting me this dark night, instantly dropped to a frown. He paused a second, as his eyes lit up and reflected a turmoil I couldn't explain. And then, all at once, he looked up to the sky and gained his composure. The next thing I knew, he burst out laughing. He nearly lost his balance, he was laughing so hard.

That was it. I wanted to strike him so hard…

"Oh my god… What the hell Nerdtron!"

His abundantly loud laugh hushed dead quiet. He took a serious tone once more. "Just… don't worry or anything Cin. Everything will work out in the end... for you. I promise that much."

"Then why the hell did you wake me up at four fucking am?"

"Whether you understand it or not, the laws of physics must be obeyed. And whether I wanted to or not, you had to be woken. No one can change fate."

If there was any way to follow this boy's train of thought, it was beyond me. But enough was enough; I couldn't take it anymore. He woke me in the middle of the night… for no reason? I walked up to him and slapped him across the face as hard as I could.

"I can't believe you!"

I saw him drop to the ground in a thud, a bitter frown on his face.

He pulled himself up from the ground and took a second to steady himself. "Well… that went better then expected… I can't tell if it's the reflecting stars or the darkness of the night. But for whatever reason, your face glows when you get angry…"

Was that a compliment? An insult? Oh god, I don't even know anymore… fuck it. I just can't stand any of this crap. It'll be luck if that sorry tuft of brown hair lives by sunrise. If

To be honest, I never expected what came next. Apparently, he had taken it upon himself to become utterly irritating, annoying and confusing the very night my grade depended on sanity. That's an all time low for the boy genius we all know and love.

He walked up to me, face to face. He took my hand in his and spoke. "I can be serious at times. If I was to ever look at you, I would prefer the night. You look best in the dark."

I threw my hand away from him. "Cut the crap, do our damn project!"

"Relax," the boy took a second to stare down at the wet grass below us. His eyes pinpointed a crawling worm on the ground, before gliding up to the luminosity sky above us. As though reading the night, his mouth opened and spoke with a rush. "I'll take you home."

"Wait...—what?" I looked back at him, completely unable to comprehend whatever the hell he was thinking of. Nerdtron was definitely acting strange. Not only was he not being himself; but he couldn't keep his thoughts straight. He seemed to be jumping from one idea to the next without any organized thought. That definitely wasn't the boy I knew. Could he actually be serious about this 'cute' crap? Or was there something more I didn't know? I'm going with the latter…

"I'm very well capable of walking myself to my own damn house, thank you very much."

"Oh really? I wouldn't say so… you need help doing just about everything."

"Oh shut up…"

Despite my obvious hints that I wanted him gone. I found it quite impossible to get him to leave. And surely enough, he walked me home… well, walked me across the street, anyway. I guess one could say the gesture was nice. But I couldn't really tell if he was doing it to mock me further, or if was doing it as an act of an apology. Yet again, I could only hope for the latter.

I looked over at him; we had just barely crossed the street when his feet came to a halting stop. His amused mockery died down instantly and before his face fell to an empty expression. It was an expression that I had never seen fall across his face. He looked… afraid? Confused? Abandoned?... hell, I've seen it so scarcely, I don't even know what the expression was!

But ever so slowly, the emotion in his eyes vanished, as a grim but noticeable smile grew on his lips. His eyes never left the long winding road. What caused him a stronger smile caused me pure utter panic.

From the direction of his eyes, a black car came screeching down the road driving far faster then what legal law would allow. It then came to a startling halt, barely a foot away. The window rolled down.

"Get in." A deep voice yelled from within. I could see a gun facing my head. I had absolutely no idea what to do. When I looked over at Nerdtron—neither did he. Seeing that boy bitterly afraid brought fear into my own heart. For as long as I had known him, he always had an answer to a problem. He could fix anything—but this time, his expression was blank. His eyes weren't vacant. For whatever reason, the boy seemed… away… resentfully away. Isolated from whatever world we were facing. My mind froze.

"Get in dammit."

Before I knew what happened and before I could think up a plan, the two of us were knocked out and thrown into the car.

---

When we awoke, we found ourselves bound at the legs and wrists. We were about three feet apart and neither of us could move. I looked over at Neutron, pleading he had some idea on what to do. Still, the boy had not come to realize what was going on. I guess for once, the boy of many talents had no answer.

That was it; I could no longer keep my hands still. I imagine if I could have actually moved my hands, they'd be shaking rather violently.

Before me, held the worst sense of isolation a person could feel. Fear was the only thing keeping me company; but it was the one thing I plagued from most. And when I looked over at that boy for support, he gave me nothing but the cold shoulder. Had I offended him? Me, offending him? I'd at least like to think I'd be the one offended! Our lives are in danger and I still had a project to get done! Wow… of all the times to worry about school…

After what seemed like hours of sitting there, staring back at blank white walls. Two men clad in black entered the room we were in. There were guns in both hands. I tried to say something, but when I uttered a noise, both guns aimed at my head.

The one who spoke held a raspy, pungent voice. He spoke with no humor, only of cruel irony. "I'm curious. Which one of you wants to die first?" What the hell type of greeting was that? Well, at any rate, it successfully made me realize how laughable my past fear was. Because now, compared to the feeling of desperation I felt before—actually… scratch that. There was no comparison. Tears lined my eyes as I tried to hold back what remaining tears I had…

His voice paused for a second, before he continued. "I have time. I'll give you two a little bit to think about it… and to let it all soak in." I could hear his rough voice laugh at us as he shut the iron door behind him and locked us in.

"Neutron… please tell me you have some way to get out of this!" I was no longer angry, just scared. Begging, pleading that he had some sort of answer!

I looked over at him, expecting a reply. But tears only fell faster from my face, as I heard the empty echo of silence answer my question.

"Please… Neutron… say something. Anything!"

Then all at once, for the first time in hours, a sign of life entered his eyes. He turned his head to me. He almost looked a little hurt at the grief he had caused me, but whatever I saw then instantly left his face. A scowl grew instead. "Yes, Cindy, I do. I mean, obviously I have super human strength which allows me to free my hands and get out of here."

"That isn't funny! I don't need your sarcasm. We could be killed!"

"Oh, a pity that would be. What do you expect? It's your damn fault we're in here!"

"What? How is it my fault? Had you not woken me up at 4 am…"

"Enough, it doesn't matter whose fault it is. If you wanted to live, you'd at least be trying to get out of here.'

"That's what I was trying to do. But you blew up at me!"

"Whatever."

We sat there in silence, hoping to come up with a way to free ourselves. Well, at least I did. I have absolutely no idea what he was doing. But as our bitter time ran out, I came to face reality. We were trapped. And when the iron doors opened once more, we weren't going to live much longer.

They walked over to Neutron, guns still held. A toothless smile grew on the leader's face. "Its been two hours. Has either of you made a decision?" Silence remained in the room. "Ok… I'll make you a deal. I'll only kill one of you and I'll let the other free. Why? Because I'm a nice guy. Don't question it."

"How the hell do I know you won't break your word?" Neutron shot back.

"I guess you don't. But think in realistic terms. Does it fucking matter? Shut your damn mouth. I think it would be wise you don't back sass the guy who decides if you live or not."

"Yeah Neutron, keep quiet!" I glared at him.

The man looked at me, then looked back at Neutron. "This should be interesting. Boyfriend and girlfriend… one of you lives, the other dies. Oh—the agony. You know, I live for this kind of thing—literally."

"W-what do you mean?" I stuttered back. "We aren't boyfriend and girlfriend! You think I'd care if he dies? Or if I die for that matter? Fuck you."

"Oh, did you hear that?" He turned to Neutron. "She doesn't care if you die. Oh… the pity… that really sucks." He chucked to himself as he continued talking. "Tough luck kid. Well, at any rate, we can't let her decide, can we? She might do something stupid like sacrifice your life for her own… wouldn't that be a shame?" His grin turned larger and he faced the man next to him. "I think it might be wise to let the boy decide…he seems to be the saner one."

I looked at my friend. A bad feeling ran in my heart… I was under Neutron's mercy. And after what has been going on… I really don't know if that is a good thing. Neutron looked up at the man once more. "What?"

"That's right. Choose: your own life, or your girlfriend's."

"She's not my girlfriend!"

Our captor groaned to himself. "Just choose..."

"You can't be serious… that isn't fair."

"Who said anything about fair? Choose or you both die."

"Can I at least know how that person would die?"

Neutron was pushing the guy's patience! I wanted to tell him to shut up, but something inside me told me not to.

Our subjugator looked at his partner with a glare, nodding over to a cupboard. From it, his partner grabbed a whip and threw it to his master.

"You want to know how?" He walked to the tied up boy. He unraveled a ghastly strip of material lined with a small blade on its side. He outstretched his arm far behind his back, steadying his weight all in one blow.

The rough sound of the whip cut the frozen air, deafening everything around me. It struck the boy, the one I claimed to hate, while I helplessly watched it from afar. The only thing I could do was scream and clench my eyes shut. When I opened my eyes, on Jimmy's back held a gash nearly a foot long, bleeding. It had torn through his shirt. From him, I could see a small pool of blood gathering.

Neutron never flinched, he never howled in pain. He merely looked on, looking blankly at the wall, as though his heart had already been crushed long ago.

"Does that answer your question?"

Neutron weakly nodded his head.

"So pick dammit, yourself or the girl. I don't have all day."

"I don't know."

"You have three seconds or I'm killing the girl."

"I-"

The murderer's voice grew louder. "Fucking hell… just spit it out!"

Neutron dropped his head as he looked back at me. It was the first time I saw pain in his eyes all night. He was going to do it. He would—

"I'm sorry Cindy…" He whispered. He looked up at the man who held him captive. And he opened his mouth to speak. He sighed for the last time of his life.

"I choose… myself."

I saw our captor take the poor boy over to the other end of the room. And slowly, I heard the whips quicken against his flesh. They continued, until the boy fell unconscious to the ground. And as I continued to hear the whip slam against the numb body, I was taken out of the room. I never saw what happened to him, after that heartbreaking day.

A tear slid down my face as the guy ushered me out of the building. I was still bound, when he tossed me out into the dark cold night. I was still bound, when my head slammed hard against the sidewalk and bitter life left my head.

---

I opened my eyes slowly, letting tears once more slide down my face, each drop splashing hard against my velvet pillow. It had been three weeks since his death.

Three weeks, I've forced to live amongst our world without the boy I loved. I never told him how I felt. But the second he left my heart, I realized what I had missed. There was something about that little boy that brought joy to my life. Whether it be his constant annoyance or his complete arrogance… there was something that made me love him.

And since his demise, I've done nothing but lock myself in my room. I couldn't face the world, knowing what had happened to him. I knew it was my fault, I knew there was something I had done, something I overlooked. But what?

His words still echo in my head. "Whether we finish our project or not, it doesn't matter." He had been right. I never had to finish that assignment. When Miss Fowl found out what happened—hell… I haven't had to do anything since. Nobody's expected me to be able to live through such an event—they treat me as though I've been traumatized. When in reality, I have. Witnessing a psycho fuck kill one of my best friends… as forced me into a rut I can't get out.

I try and try, but I still can't seem to get him out of my head. The night of his death seemed entirely fixated upon me. There was something glowing in his eyes that betrayed everything he said. I guess I can't get by the fact that he had complimented me. He had called me cute. At the time I never took him seriously. He was just a joker, a kidder, a pathetic boy mocking me for his own sense of humor... But why?

Why would he act the way he did? Why did that day unfold the way it had? Why did it come… in sequence? In order? It seemed so… planned out.

At any rate, I couldn't stand the thought of being alone any longer. I had to know why the hell this happened—or I wouldn't have been able to live my life any further. And when I swore to myself I would find out why he left me, I departed from my room for the first time in those three weeks and went to Jimmy's lab.

His lab was interestingly laid out. But it troubled me to find stacks upon stacks of paper slammed against walls, littering the floor. I remember months ago being in his room, seeing it nice and tidy. But this time, he looked like he had gone insane.

I searched for an answer. My eyes stumbled upon anything and everything. If a paper looked out of place, I scanned it. And after tossing away nearly a thousand Betty Quinlan pictures, six-discarded love notes with no name specifying whom they were to and a stack of papers the size of Butch… I gave up.

Though as I left his lab, a little red book caught my eye. His diary was on his desk. It was open to a page… the last page of the book; my eyes inspected it.

"…_My life held but one meaning, to hold love for a blond haired girl. But when she had betrayed me, when she had destroyed everything I had ever lived for. It was clear to me—there is no point to my life…"_

I quickly scanned the words before it and after. All at once, the answers fell into place. Two nights ago, he had created the first working time machine. And how did he test it to make sure it worked? He went two days into the future.

It was my luck, he had entered at the exact moment that he seen himself defeat two grotesque villains in a black car. Afterwards, he proposed his love for me. But when I didn't return it—

Tears fell from my eyes.

"_When you read this, I am sorry. I am sorry for how this must end. Just remember one thing. Whether you accept it or not, I never got to tell you how I feel. _

_Cindy Vortex… I have always loved you and I forever will, even if you don't love me back…"_

From my hands, I felt tears slide down my cheek. My knees slammed against his concrete floor, falling in front a machine the size of my height. The thing that had caused me pain stood before my face. It was clear to me now. Knowledge was Jimmy Neutron's only downfall… his genius was his weakness.

---

"…_But this time, my reasons for protection faded. Everything I had once known disappeared before me, crumbling and growing raw with revenge. When I looked into her emerald green eyes, I no longer saw anything worth saving. _

_Just minutes after the action of death, I had spun myself to her that fateful night. Spilling my heart with everything I wished her to hear. Though when my words spoke what my heart had concealed, she blankly stared back. Then her features turned to a raw smile and mocked everything I had ever believed. She looked me straight in the eyes and laughed. Laughed at what I said; then ridiculed me for it. _

_My life held but one meaning, to hold love for a blond haired girl. But when she had betrayed me, when she had destroyed everything I had ever lived for. It was clear to me—there is no point to my life at all._

_When I found out how my life would unfold. I couldn't stand living another second. Future holds but a deed I cannot change. No science can bend the will of someone else, no matter how hard you try or how much you learn. A person's fate can never change; the outcome of life is predefined. And because of that, I refuse to live another day._

_When you read this, I am sorry. I am sorry for how this must end. Just remember one thing. Whether you accept it or not, I never got to tell you how I feel. _

_Cindy Vortex… I have always loved you and I forever will, even if you don't love me back._

_-Neutron, Nerdtron…Boy Genius…"_


End file.
